A lot of players get fucked over by relationships.. pure and simple
this comes from not understanding the cycle… (everything amazing at first… you get sucked in.. slowly it gets bad)
I don’t recommend ever taking relationships seriously but if you do.. theres something you need to know…
people get way too attached… way too committed
Over time relationships go bad.. the brain chemicals don’t do it anymore..people change..problems arise..
the problem is.. a lot of people see relationships as a “forever” thing.
A smart man once told me something:
“Nothing is forever”
thats exactly how you should approach a relationship. Don’t think of it as something forever.. just think of it as a fun time.. don’t invest too heavily into it..
You lose a part of yourself with every relationship that you mis-manage (by over-investing)
its like a food product that goes bad. Sure you can refrigerate it.. but damn eventually you gotta throw that shit out.
relationships have an expiration date.. u gotta know when to walk away
thx for visiting
May 30th, 2011 at 7:38 am
so well written..hope I could understand this last year and not invest too much into an already broken relationship..now I understand it much better
thanx..
May 30th, 2011 at 11:34 pm
Excellent observation Paul,
I had a similar thought. I learned never to become dependent on any female . You can be in a relationship with a “coo” girl but the minute you become dependent on her i.e food, shelter, money, she will change like a chameleon .
The trick is to not forget about yourself to make the other person happy. Happiness comes from within not from your mate . Good Post !
May 30th, 2011 at 11:47 pm
All relationships come to an end. Either you break up or one of you dies. There are no happy endings.
May 31st, 2011 at 5:40 pm
Wise beyond words. Thanks for dropping us some insight PTK.
May 31st, 2011 at 9:15 pm
@Paultheking-Good insight bro’.This all ties into loosing attraction.Some guys become way too invested while the girl isnt on same plain.
June 3rd, 2011 at 12:25 pm
I agree in the don’t get heavily invested part, however I do think relationships can go the looong distance when both stay invested in their own personal pursuit of happiness. I don’t mean cheating either. It’s important to realize that problems will come and go and that people change (so do you), but if core values remain then it’s worth sticking around. The fun of a new romance gets tiring after you’ve had many of them, all things fade. The beauty of having someone in your life who genuinely cares overshadows the fun of early days. I’ve dated and had many relationships, one of several years which I ended, but my new one seems genuinely low on dependency which we both love, mind you it hasn’t been a year yet.
Just my two cents.
June 4th, 2011 at 1:22 pm
has anyone else noticed that aofe cant stop shouting out to the world that she’s in a relationship? I guess when your as old as she is, it’s better than winning the lottery.
June 10th, 2011 at 1:33 pm
My man, Paul! I just discovered your blog a little while ago and I’m glad I have. This was an excellent post…
I was in an amazing 2 year/3+ month relationship. Fell in love with her, and fell hard. Became extremely invested to the point of co-dependence. Now, let me clarify — I wasn’t like this for the first year of the relationship she and I had. The second year part of it, that’s when I started to lose my own identity and lose touch with the person I was (am?). No excuses, though. And, if I could go back in time, I’d do it all over again. Amazing relationship, but I think the facets of gray hair that I already have at an extremely young age, ‘maybe’ it was coerced by the stress I put myself under.
June 13th, 2011 at 5:35 pm
Great post paul, short and to the point/ One of my boys just met a chick and after 2 weeks said he loved her and after 5 weeks is already planning on moving in with her. They wanted me to move in with them I was like “awww noooo”
June 14th, 2011 at 1:11 am
This site is wonderful. Write some more, motherfucker!